life is not like the movies,
where happy-endings are a must,
for me,life's just like an illlusion,
where my desired plans go bust.
life is not like the movies,
where a hero gets his girl,
for me,I try so hard but to no avail,
all she does is,send my mind in a twirl.
life is not like the movies,
where the bad guys get punishd,
someone said "nice guys finish last",
is the only that exists.
life is not like movies,
where a hero saves the world from all the pain,
for many real heros tried to change this world,
but,eventually,all went in vain.
life is not like the movies,
where justice will prevail,
for justice is a 7-lettered word,
that has been derailed.
Life is not like the movies,
where everything ends in a matter of hours,
for me,hours feel like years,
and the minutes passing seem like dull,lifeless flowers.
How I wish life was like the movies!
but alas!life is not like the movies
-----Shubham Mamgain
Monday, March 17, 2008
Saturday, March 1, 2008
A Letter to My Guitar
dear guitar,
Its been so long since I touched you.you look so rusted and old now and its all my fault for not cleaning you from time to time.
There was a time when i used to be with you for hours and not get tired of you.I would never study and play you for hours.Whenever I was sad,I got your support.Just strumming those basic chord patterns gave me such a big high that I instantly forgot about all my pains and miseries.When I was happy,I would strum you till eternity.When I was angry ,I would strum you so hard that the strings would plead mercy.Basically,you were my outlet of expression.
Just playing those scales would make me feel like a superman.I remember how, once, my friends were amazed by the way I played and the compliments they showered me with were enough to bloom a thousand flowers.Suddenly, it didn't matter that I was short,hunchbacked and babyfaced.All that mattered was,I played the guitar better than most of the boys of my age.
In 11th grade,when I was in the grunge phase,you had to bear the brunt of a thousand Nirvana songs.When I was in 12th,you had to suffer from Pearl Jam'oesia.When I got my guitar processor,you had to come in terms of the different sounds i could get out of you.I thank you facing all the things I put you through.Broken relationships,bad grades,seeking acceptance from people,12th standard paranoia,you have been there with me through it all and I have cherised each day evr since I first touched you.
When I see a thousand kids learning guitar just because it is cool,my heart breaks because I know they will never feel about their guitars the way I feel about you.Because for me,its all about understanding you to the core.The magic that your 24 frets create is something i'm fascinated with and as I listen to this song by an Indian band called Half Step Down, about how guitar is a priority over a girl,I couldn't help but agree.
Its been one rocky road with journals,projects and tons of notes to study.I may not give you a lot of time but I know I will sooner or later.With parental rumblings and an expectation to survive in the corporate world,I am helpless.You may not be on my lap as often as you used to be,but I do promise to be with you for the rest of my life because for me,you are life!
yours truly,
Shubham
Its been so long since I touched you.you look so rusted and old now and its all my fault for not cleaning you from time to time.
There was a time when i used to be with you for hours and not get tired of you.I would never study and play you for hours.Whenever I was sad,I got your support.Just strumming those basic chord patterns gave me such a big high that I instantly forgot about all my pains and miseries.When I was happy,I would strum you till eternity.When I was angry ,I would strum you so hard that the strings would plead mercy.Basically,you were my outlet of expression.
Just playing those scales would make me feel like a superman.I remember how, once, my friends were amazed by the way I played and the compliments they showered me with were enough to bloom a thousand flowers.Suddenly, it didn't matter that I was short,hunchbacked and babyfaced.All that mattered was,I played the guitar better than most of the boys of my age.
In 11th grade,when I was in the grunge phase,you had to bear the brunt of a thousand Nirvana songs.When I was in 12th,you had to suffer from Pearl Jam'oesia.When I got my guitar processor,you had to come in terms of the different sounds i could get out of you.I thank you facing all the things I put you through.Broken relationships,bad grades,seeking acceptance from people,12th standard paranoia,you have been there with me through it all and I have cherised each day evr since I first touched you.
When I see a thousand kids learning guitar just because it is cool,my heart breaks because I know they will never feel about their guitars the way I feel about you.Because for me,its all about understanding you to the core.The magic that your 24 frets create is something i'm fascinated with and as I listen to this song by an Indian band called Half Step Down, about how guitar is a priority over a girl,I couldn't help but agree.
Its been one rocky road with journals,projects and tons of notes to study.I may not give you a lot of time but I know I will sooner or later.With parental rumblings and an expectation to survive in the corporate world,I am helpless.You may not be on my lap as often as you used to be,but I do promise to be with you for the rest of my life because for me,you are life!
yours truly,
Shubham
Friday, February 22, 2008
When I Had Long Hair
During childhood,long hair was something I associated only with female species and rockstars.in school,we were allowed to grow our hair only till the size of our thumb.So,there was no way I could think of growing my hair.Anyways,the idea of growing hair was absurd for me at that time.
But with growing interest in rock music,the diea of growing hair started becoming hip and cool.Suddenly,short hair felt like an insult to a human being.As a fan of Eddie Vedder,Zack De La Rocha,growing my hair became a necessity but their was a slight problem-my parents!!
My parents would force me to cut my hair regularly.So,it felt like school again during college days.Years passed by and my hair remained short until my first year of graduation.
Graduation started and so did my urge to grow hair!this time i was influenced by shabby,floppy,unwashed hair which are sported by members of many brit-rock bands like snow patrol,coldplay and american band like the strokes.So,i started growing my hair much to the dismay of my parents.The constant rattlings couldn't break me as I continued to grow my hair.With long hair and a dense beard,i started looking like a rockstar on the road.It was a great
feeling to have something in common with great rockstars who have changed the world with their music.Suddenly,long hair became a symbol of being one in the crowd.Long hair gave me my sense of individuality.But I had my share of troubles!
With long hair,suddenly,I became the butt of everyone's jokes.I got a lot of nicknames like
"baal ki dukaan","dhoni","charsi".It was then that I began to realize that my paents were not the only one who were hell bent on short hair,the whole crowd was!the way people compare you to a celebrity really amuses me.
When I had long hair,people started calling me "Dhoni".When I started wearing a hair band,people started calling me "Abhishek Bacchan"!!!gimme a break!!i have been wearing it much before Abhishek Bacchan even came into the limelight!I'm sure if I become bald someday,people will call me Anupam Kher!!the fact that people couldn't accept me the way I was,depressed me a lot but I got over it after sometime.If I like it,to hell with people!!!people just need a reason to let you down.
I started having long hair quite often.I used to cut my hair only after every 6 months.The beard went unshaved for months.Constant grumblings continued fro my parents but it was of no use.I had become a rebel.
Now,I have cut my hair short again.This time,it was my decision alone.Long hair had become kinda boring for me and a change was definitely on the cards and as someone said "change is the only permanent thing".My hair is now short.Feels like school again.With a heavy heart,I had to get my long hair cut short.
But long hair will be a symbol of the time I realized what I didn't need to do.I didn't need to follow the crowd.I didn't need to change myself for acceptance.I just had to accept myself the way I was.I just had to be myself.Dhoni,baal ki dukaan or charsi!the fact is that long hair era will always be imprinted in my mind.It taught me to be me and not someone else.Long hair era a life changing experience.
Nowadays, I sport a fauxhawk twice every week.Can you guess which bollywood celebrity I'm addressed as?
But with growing interest in rock music,the diea of growing hair started becoming hip and cool.Suddenly,short hair felt like an insult to a human being.As a fan of Eddie Vedder,Zack De La Rocha,growing my hair became a necessity but their was a slight problem-my parents!!
My parents would force me to cut my hair regularly.So,it felt like school again during college days.Years passed by and my hair remained short until my first year of graduation.
Graduation started and so did my urge to grow hair!this time i was influenced by shabby,floppy,unwashed hair which are sported by members of many brit-rock bands like snow patrol,coldplay and american band like the strokes.So,i started growing my hair much to the dismay of my parents.The constant rattlings couldn't break me as I continued to grow my hair.With long hair and a dense beard,i started looking like a rockstar on the road.It was a great
feeling to have something in common with great rockstars who have changed the world with their music.Suddenly,long hair became a symbol of being one in the crowd.Long hair gave me my sense of individuality.But I had my share of troubles!
With long hair,suddenly,I became the butt of everyone's jokes.I got a lot of nicknames like
"baal ki dukaan","dhoni","charsi".It was then that I began to realize that my paents were not the only one who were hell bent on short hair,the whole crowd was!the way people compare you to a celebrity really amuses me.
When I had long hair,people started calling me "Dhoni".When I started wearing a hair band,people started calling me "Abhishek Bacchan"!!!gimme a break!!i have been wearing it much before Abhishek Bacchan even came into the limelight!I'm sure if I become bald someday,people will call me Anupam Kher!!the fact that people couldn't accept me the way I was,depressed me a lot but I got over it after sometime.If I like it,to hell with people!!!people just need a reason to let you down.
I started having long hair quite often.I used to cut my hair only after every 6 months.The beard went unshaved for months.Constant grumblings continued fro my parents but it was of no use.I had become a rebel.
Now,I have cut my hair short again.This time,it was my decision alone.Long hair had become kinda boring for me and a change was definitely on the cards and as someone said "change is the only permanent thing".My hair is now short.Feels like school again.With a heavy heart,I had to get my long hair cut short.
But long hair will be a symbol of the time I realized what I didn't need to do.I didn't need to follow the crowd.I didn't need to change myself for acceptance.I just had to accept myself the way I was.I just had to be myself.Dhoni,baal ki dukaan or charsi!the fact is that long hair era will always be imprinted in my mind.It taught me to be me and not someone else.Long hair era a life changing experience.
Nowadays, I sport a fauxhawk twice every week.Can you guess which bollywood celebrity I'm addressed as?
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Some uncommon love songs
So valentine's day is over!yay!!!!!!!!!!!!
News channles gave us tips on how to date?how to propose?what to buy?yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Music channels played cheesy love songs!!!!yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Its not like I don't like love songs.Its just that i don't like cheesy love songs which are played over and over again.
"nothing's gonna change my love for you"
"i just called to say i love you"
"everything I do I do it for you"
you get the drift right?
So here are some on the uncommon love songs I can listen to over and over again
1.Foo Fighters---walking after you
This song just give me the chills!!from the soundtrack of X-files,this song has some really wonderful guitar work and Dave Grohl sounds really warm in this one.Come to think of it,I'm really surprised that this song had to be a part of X-Files movie as sci-fi,aliens and a love song song don't really go together.do they?
2.Goo Goo Dolls---slide
The intro is as refreshing as can be.the party starts after the intro.This song is a fast paced,optimistic song and a real winner right from the word go.John Rzeznik just steals the show in this one.
3.Six Pence None The Richer---kiss me
Haven't seen this band anywhere for quite sometime but that doesn't stop me from including this song on the number 3 spot.this song is just pure beauty.
4.Incubus---I miss you
A band that is known for its experimentation and angst-ridden lyrics surprised me with this one.I have heard both the electric and the acoustic version of this song and i can't choose which one is better.the lyrics are just wonderful and Brandon Boyd sings this one with ease!!this song is what i call "short and sweet".
5.Sufjan Stevens---to be alone with you
This song is from the TV series OC(Orange County).this song is minimalism to its best.With just a guitar and a voice,this song manages to haunt you and leave you wanting for more.Sufjan Stevens sounds wonderful in this song.Definitely one of the songs that don't come out every other day!
So,this is my list of some of the uncommon love songs I like.Please let me know about your favourite love songs in the "comments" section.thanks for reading.tc!!!!
News channles gave us tips on how to date?how to propose?what to buy?yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Music channels played cheesy love songs!!!!yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Its not like I don't like love songs.Its just that i don't like cheesy love songs which are played over and over again.
"nothing's gonna change my love for you"
"i just called to say i love you"
"everything I do I do it for you"
you get the drift right?
So here are some on the uncommon love songs I can listen to over and over again
1.Foo Fighters---walking after you
This song just give me the chills!!from the soundtrack of X-files,this song has some really wonderful guitar work and Dave Grohl sounds really warm in this one.Come to think of it,I'm really surprised that this song had to be a part of X-Files movie as sci-fi,aliens and a love song song don't really go together.do they?
2.Goo Goo Dolls---slide
The intro is as refreshing as can be.the party starts after the intro.This song is a fast paced,optimistic song and a real winner right from the word go.John Rzeznik just steals the show in this one.
3.Six Pence None The Richer---kiss me
Haven't seen this band anywhere for quite sometime but that doesn't stop me from including this song on the number 3 spot.this song is just pure beauty.
4.Incubus---I miss you
A band that is known for its experimentation and angst-ridden lyrics surprised me with this one.I have heard both the electric and the acoustic version of this song and i can't choose which one is better.the lyrics are just wonderful and Brandon Boyd sings this one with ease!!this song is what i call "short and sweet".
5.Sufjan Stevens---to be alone with you
This song is from the TV series OC(Orange County).this song is minimalism to its best.With just a guitar and a voice,this song manages to haunt you and leave you wanting for more.Sufjan Stevens sounds wonderful in this song.Definitely one of the songs that don't come out every other day!
So,this is my list of some of the uncommon love songs I like.Please let me know about your favourite love songs in the "comments" section.thanks for reading.tc!!!!
Monday, February 11, 2008
First and Final Rock Shows
man!!!Its been a long time since i have been away from this thing.feels like coming home again!!!!
my life has turned 360 degrees.2008 is turning out to be a rollercoaster ride till now.My attitude has changed.i have become more mellow ,chilled and have become an optimist.the last rock show i attended here might well be my last rock show here. and what a coincidence!!the last band i saw was the first band I ever saw performing live.Zero was the reason of my sudden interest in Indian Rock which was limited to only nanosecond glimpses of Parikrama on TV before Zero came along!!and man did they kill it that night!!!
the venue itself was magical!!!Carter road promenade!!!!cool breeze ,nice PYTs.Couldn't have asked for more.so Zero hit the stage at around 8 in the night.They started off with Sweet Home Alabama.I just wasn't impressed.then they played another random crowd pleaser.I wasn't impressed.Then,they played Roxanne in total Zero-ishtyle and man !was i impressed!!!!jsut when i thought this band was getting their groove right,a surprise came along.I saw a sari clad,energetic lady with a red bindi on her head.
As she came onstage,i had only one thing i felt for her!respect!!Ms.Usha Uthup has been a symbol of women empowerment in my opinion.Singing at restaurants at a very ripe age,she displayed courage and dedication when all the other girls of her age were locked up in their houses.Although she wasn't quite upto mark that day as far her singing goes,she made up for it by her sheer energy and she definitely didn't deserve the booing of the crowd!!not in my book.she sang for half an hour after which zero took the stage again.This time,they kicked ass right from the word go.They started off with maddona's material girl,then progressed to banana boat song.they got the crowd dancing by starting off with La Bamba!!!
Their 2nd album,Hook,had just released at that time,and they played quite a few originals from the album which got a really good response.After playing for 2 hours,they finally finished the show with a Led Zepplin medley that blew me away eventhough I was not a Led Zepplin fan(nor am I today).Hell, i had not even heard Stairway to Heaven at that time!!!this had to be the best first rock show ever!!
I saw them recently at an unplugged show.Much has changed for Zero over then years(read:changing guitarists)but what hasn't changed is the tightness and the energy of the band.I got very bored of them somewhere in between after the departure of Warren.The band didn't feel the same again.But,with a kickass unplugged performance,they have proved that they are one of the best bands of India and that a certain 4-lettered word will always be loved and respected and that is "Zero".
my life has turned 360 degrees.2008 is turning out to be a rollercoaster ride till now.My attitude has changed.i have become more mellow ,chilled and have become an optimist.the last rock show i attended here might well be my last rock show here. and what a coincidence!!the last band i saw was the first band I ever saw performing live.Zero was the reason of my sudden interest in Indian Rock which was limited to only nanosecond glimpses of Parikrama on TV before Zero came along!!and man did they kill it that night!!!
the venue itself was magical!!!Carter road promenade!!!!cool breeze ,nice PYTs.Couldn't have asked for more.so Zero hit the stage at around 8 in the night.They started off with Sweet Home Alabama.I just wasn't impressed.then they played another random crowd pleaser.I wasn't impressed.Then,they played Roxanne in total Zero-ishtyle and man !was i impressed!!!!jsut when i thought this band was getting their groove right,a surprise came along.I saw a sari clad,energetic lady with a red bindi on her head.
As she came onstage,i had only one thing i felt for her!respect!!Ms.Usha Uthup has been a symbol of women empowerment in my opinion.Singing at restaurants at a very ripe age,she displayed courage and dedication when all the other girls of her age were locked up in their houses.Although she wasn't quite upto mark that day as far her singing goes,she made up for it by her sheer energy and she definitely didn't deserve the booing of the crowd!!not in my book.she sang for half an hour after which zero took the stage again.This time,they kicked ass right from the word go.They started off with maddona's material girl,then progressed to banana boat song.they got the crowd dancing by starting off with La Bamba!!!
Their 2nd album,Hook,had just released at that time,and they played quite a few originals from the album which got a really good response.After playing for 2 hours,they finally finished the show with a Led Zepplin medley that blew me away eventhough I was not a Led Zepplin fan(nor am I today).Hell, i had not even heard Stairway to Heaven at that time!!!this had to be the best first rock show ever!!
I saw them recently at an unplugged show.Much has changed for Zero over then years(read:changing guitarists)but what hasn't changed is the tightness and the energy of the band.I got very bored of them somewhere in between after the departure of Warren.The band didn't feel the same again.But,with a kickass unplugged performance,they have proved that they are one of the best bands of India and that a certain 4-lettered word will always be loved and respected and that is "Zero".
Sunday, October 28, 2007
My idea of fun
its a Saturday evening have pretty much nothing to do. all my daily chores have been taken care of in the morning itself.
i get a call from Mr.x.
x:"hey ,shubham,listen let's go for a movie"
me:"which?"
x:"this movie called fsdfadf which starres xyz and rty.its gonna be killer fun."
me:”and where is this?”
x:”dfwdf” multiplex. its newly built and it looks just fabulous. I hope you are coming.
me:naah man. I have to go somewhere.
x:cmon man, its not everyday that such a movie gets released.
me: sorry dude but I got to go to this place for important work
x:ok then,tc ,cya sometime. You are missing out on all the fun.
I keep the phone down.
I knew I was free.
I knew my friends were going there.
I knew it would have made sense to go there as I had nothing else to do.
But going for movies, eating out in a fancy restaurant, going bowling, playing pool and all other random snobbish sports.
These kind of things are not my idea of having fun. I would rather stay at home and listen to music which takes me away to a different trip.
i have been labelled as boring, serious just because I don't approve of their idea of fun.
So what exactly is my idea of fun?
My idea of fun is going to rock shows. As you must have known by now about my inclination towards music, it would be understandable that I like to go for such shows.
Its always good to check out different artists of different genres and it gives a great pleasure to me in doing so.
the different genres i have been exposed to, is one of the things i take pride in. Its not only rock, but fusion,electronica,IDM,etc.That has caught my attention.
When rock shows are nowhere to be seen, my next idea of having fun is to travel in places we wouldn't have otherwise.
Ever heard of Dahanu?ever heard of khopoli?
I didn't know of them, until last year. I find a great sense of happiness and joy in traveling to places which have never been visited or the places which have been totally neglected by the urban types who prefer to go to
Well ,I like
Its a fact that where a humans lives, is a dirty place which once was beautiful. the Humans left no stone unturned in destroying it.
I would love to travel to such places. although sometimes I wish I had my own car so that i would have had no problems in going there.Booking a bus can be such a fuss sometimes.
I had the privilege of going for a trek to this really beautiful waterfall in Nagothane(Maharashtra).The waterfall was so beautiful ,it almost brought tears to my eyes.Nature can be inspiring.
I and my friends had so much fun. I bet I wouldn't be having so much fun anywhere else. the gushing of waterfall, getting drenched in pure water, it was just fabulous. It was a spiritual experience as well.
this is my idea of fun. I don't really enjoy the mall culture fun(bowling, eating out, playing pool and other random things).call me boring,but that's the way i live.
i was getting an opportunity to watch the t20 match that was held in Brabourne stadium,Mumbai. Cricket being one of the things I enjoy watching and playing, it was hard to refuse. But my idea of fun is something which completely deviates from the norm everyone has.
So with a lot of courage, I had to reject it.
I’ll have my kind of fun someday
Peace.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
the day i will never forget
23rd October, 2007.The day I will never forget. After 14,900 days of confusion over my future, I have finally decided what really want to do.Graphic design.
The satisfaction i feel today can't beat any other day. I must have not utilized my time in the past .I must have been wasting my time in watching TV, listening to radio and other random things. But on this day, I forgive myself for everything I have done in the past.
It’s difficult to lead a life which others prescribe for you. It’s also difficult to lead a life which you prescribe for yourself but is not appreciated by anyone.Sometimes its all about breaking the stereotypes in the society. It’s all about breaking away from the shackles of this society and I’m ready to break it. I'm ready!!!!
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